She could feel her friends concern for her. It was thick and palpable bordering on anger, confusion and astonishment. She couldn’t blame her. She’d been there before. Marrying outside her tribe meant she had to adapt to the changes life brought. While she loved her husband with all her heart, there were times when she wondered if she was doing the right thing.
She wondered about the different culture and belief system, a totally different outlook to life, their belief in one God who is all in all? To be honest, there were times she was totally confused and astonished at their way of life. But her father in law had been kind and gentle; he treated everyone fairly and loved his family deeply. There was just something about him. Her mother in law was the same, kind, gentle but firm. She imagined that she would be that way with their kids; they would never be spoilt if Naomi had anything to do with it! But alas there were no kids, and her husband’s grave was still fresh.
She had come to know her mother in law on deeper levels she hadn’t known existed. Maybe it had to do with their shared grief, loss and pain. There were times they would sit in the darkness all night, talking. They would talk about the men and the little things they did. The joke they told and mistakes they made even the silly things they did to amuse the women. Most of these sessions ended in tears, quiet tears that continued to tear deep at Ruth’s heart.
Why did they have to die? Why was she suddenly a widow? Young and alone. Then she’d think of Naomi and shudder. Did she deserve it just because she was older? Was she more prone to accept her loss because she was graying?
Her days continued to be filled with longing for her late husband, for her father and brother in law, for what used to be. Calls for her to come back home fell on deaf ears; even if she wanted to go back to her parents, she just couldn’t do it. Much had changed since she married into the Elimelechs’ family.
Looking into her friend’s eyes now that was all she could say. “I belong here now, with Naomi. That is my choice to make.
“But there is nothing for you here. Nothing. Come home Ruth. You can get married start a life. There are many young men of our tribe who would love to marry you. You’re still a beauty you know.” she chuckled at her friend’s words and shrugged. I don’t even see that anymore. Somehow, my life has taken on more urgency and more meaning.” She sighed, looking through the open window into the afternoon sky.
“What…what if Naomi leaves? She has no reason to stay. Then you will have no choice but to return.”
“Well, then if she leaves, then I shall go with her.”
Her friend shrank back in shock, her face aghast at Ruth’s firm but gentle words.
“You wouldn’t!”
Days later as she watched Orpah’s retreating back and listened to Naomi’s impassioned plea for her to return home she smiled faintly at the thought of her friend’s shocked expression when she told her that going with Naomi was an option. Now she knew it was the only option.
She reached for the older woman’s sack and balanced it on her right shoulder as they made their way into a yet uncertain future.
She had slowly shifted onto the right path now it was time to hurry on to her destiny.